Friday, 11th September, Feeling crap


2:59pm. I had intended to go to the stones today, a place that has become very important to me. I woke up in time but my left ankle was quite painful and sore so I decided against it. I felt the walk up there would be too much with the Yorkshireman Half on Sunday and decided to rest it instead. I thought about going to the rock a place I haven’t visited for a while but again didn’t feel up to the sort walk to the rock.

Instead I stayed in bed for a bit longer and after breakfast went down to the big Tesco’s to fill up with petrol and get some fruit. I feel a lot better today than I did yesterday and if I had run today with yesterday’s ankle I might have been even faster than I was. I’m not going to sit here thinking about what might have been. I did my best on the day and I’m happy with my time.

I’ve written a synopsis for my book! It’s a first attempt but it’s a start at least. I never do these things because I have a fear of rejection and failure but I’m not going to get anywhere sat in my house doing nothing and risking nothing. The first one might take it on or it might take ten attempts but without nothing my life story is just untold words on a laptop doing nothing and I feel my life is worth more than that however nervous and apprehensive it makes me feel. I’ve sent it to Claire to see what she thinks. I value Claire’s opinion always truthful and honest but supportive and encouraging.

My ankle feels better now I’ve changed my shoes to my Sketchers. They feel as if they are supporting it more so hopefully it’ll be ok for Sunday and I can perform at my best. My headache has returned too making life difficult and unbearable but I’ll get through it and I won’t let it win. I’m hoping to go to the club for a few in a bit but might go to bed cause of my headache.

10:14pm. I went to the club in the hope my headache would go. It didn’t it got worse. I feel absolutely crap.

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