A surreal start to the day

Awakening from a deep slumber
I go to the bathroom to relive myself
And find the ant from next door sat on the toilet
Who surprises me by
Telling me to ‘kindly get out while I wash my hair’
And not to disturb him every again!
Whilst they read the Daily TNA
So downstairs I go to have my
Breakfast with
Mr Toad sat in a commode, warts n all
Who informs me in his squeaky voice
That we will be having a
Delectable breakfast of banana soup
Complete with a topping of woodlice
For around 6 feet of good measure
“Take it or leave it”
I’m told by Mr Toad
So having a distinct dislike of banana’s
I decide I’ll miss breakfast
And head to the shops instead
Where I am promptly arrested by
Mr Centipede the long arm of the law
For wearing no knickers
And off I go to the hut made of
Crackerbread and cheese
Where I can sort my head out
Whilst I eat the cheese
And contemplate a morning of
“There goes the alarm clock”
“Time to get up”
Off to the bathroom I go
And that bloody ant is still there
Sat on my toilet
“Here we go again”
I say to myself

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