Saturday, 29 July 2023
I woke feeling good but also knowing I need to make some lifestyle changes or I’m not going to get where I want to be. I’m still eating food that doesn’t benefit me, bread, crisps, trifles and other such food and there making me bloated and sluggish and keeping the weight on when it should be coming off. I need to change or accept my fate…
I spent the morning staring at the laptop screen. For some reason I get overly anxious and stressed when I want to do uni work. To me it’s not rational, there’s no reason I should be afraid of uni work, I mean all it will do is improve my knowledge, so I have to ask myself if I’m scared of learning and what I will discover about the world and most of all about myself?
I must have stared at the screen for an hour, surfing the net, Facebook, news sites, anything to avoid doing any uni work, but then I ran out of sites to surf and started on my uni work. The work I’m doing is pretty standard, looking for papers and articles and filling in forms and spreadsheets, but it’s a necessary part of doing academic research and a part many people don’t see or think about. A lot of research, especially academic research, is very boring to most people, but also very necessary to achieve what you set out to do, and this is the 10% of what people see and what gets them excited.
I set about my task of doing my uni work and I enjoyed it. I enjoy searching for papers and articles and logging my results meticulously, and seeing what the results bring, and then writing the results up. I had a break where I had a nap on the sofa with my little girl curled up beside me, and after my nap I did some more uni work. As I was doing it I realised I have nothing to fear, there’s nothing to be scared of, and so much to be gained from researching and learning and doing something that may just help people live a better life.
The Autistic FellRunner 