Tuesday, 04 July 2023
I didn’t have any alcohol yesterday and I had a better night’s sleep and feel much better today. Better doesn’t mean normal as I felt 3 years ago when I was running 40+ miles a week no problem. Better now means the brain fog, lack of focus and concentration are better than they were yesterday. They’re still there but more manageable today. My lower back is worse than yesterday, I have no idea why although it must be linked to my hip. The pain is intense, but I’ve learnt to live with it as I have no choice. It’s either that or spend all day laying in bed staring at the ceiling!
Despite everything I’m feeling good today. I’m sure some people think I’m just a moaner who can’t cope with any pain, but I’m a lot stronger than they’ll ever know. It doesn’t help that these are the sort of people who make assumptions about me, tell others their assumptions about me but never talk to me. I don’t understand how people can make assumptions about anyone without getting to know them first. It doesn’t make any sense. Anyway, these are the people I don’t want to be around or have anything to do with. I want people who believe me and support me, so that I can be a better person and achieve everything I want to.
I’ve got a doctors appointment too! It’s a miracle in this day and age, but I’ve managed to get one and hopefully I can start getting somewhere with the aches, pains and brain fog I’m experiencing. All I want is to know that something is happening and that someone will get to the bottom of whatever it is that is causing my health to slowly go downhill. Is that too much to ask?
It’s been a good day today. Nothing exciting, but nothing bad either, just a nice, steady day when I made progress with my uni work, had a nice walk for the second day in a row, haven’t had any alcohol for the second day in a row and feel better for it. A nice, quiet, unassuming day, which is how I like my days.
The Autistic FellRunner 